Life is tough and confusing and weird. We all need help sometimes, and when you need an expert opinion, you turn to an expert opinion-giver like Robin Halper. Whatever problem you’re facing in life, Robin will have a solution. The Cascade cannot guarantee the effectiveness of Robin’s unique approach to life, but if you’re in a jam, get some advice by writing to halp@ufvcascade.ca
Snack problems
Dear Robin,
I’m pretty sure I got food poisoning from a granola bar I ate from a vending machine on campus because a couple of hours after I ate it, I pretty much exploded. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Vomiting from the vendings
Hey,
There are so many things wrong with your letter to me. Firstly, I don’t think you can get food poisoning from a granola bar. Secondly, what do you mean, “What should I do?” You got sick. By the time you’re reading this in print, you’re probably all better now and learned how to deal with it like every other human. Take some Advil, drink some water, and go to sleep. If you get food poisoning from the cafeteria, then shoot me a letter because then we’ve got some digging to do.
Robin
Scheduling lounge wear
Dear Robin,
I’m always torn on when in the semester it’s appropriate to start wearing sweatpants. I don’t want to look super pathetic by wearing them in January, but I also don’t want to look like every other student when wearing them in April during exams. When do you think is a good time to break them out?
Sincerely,
Sucker for sweats
Hello,
This is an easy one: never. Well, pretty much never. Because like you said, you can’t wear sweats in the first month of the semester because you don’t want to show your professors that you’ve already given up. During exam season, you still want to stand out with your fashion choices, so you can’t wear them then either. The only time sweatpants are acceptable is if you spend the night in the hospital with a loved one while trying to pump out a final paper while running on shitty coffee. That’s it.
Robin