Clawing for a solution

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This article was published on November 21, 2018 and may be out of date. To maintain our historical record, The Cascade does not update or remove outdated articles.
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In previous trips to nail salons I have personally avoided getting fake nails, and instead favoured the simple gel manicure. That way, I could continue using my hands and fingers as normal for daily tasks. This week however, for the first time in my life, my mother and sister managed to convince me to be brave and try something new. So, having been challenged, I walked into a nail salon confident and ready for a new adventure. I have never been so naive.

Who ever thought it would be a good idea to make unrealistically long nails fashionable? I can barely type, text, or even zip up my pants!

The real problem is that despite my impairments, I can’t stop staring at my hands. They’re just so darned pretty. Having essentially glued-on insta-claws can have its perks, such as finally being able to scratch that one spot on my back I couldn’t quite reach before. Thus, as a result of their insignificant and minor benefits, I can’t even bring myself to get them removed.

I have a term paper to type up this week. What have I done to myself?

Image: Simer Haer

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