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Porn again: is pornography changing our view of sexuality?

Is watching porn a good thing or a bad thing? Can it be beneficial or does it only lead to depravity? Here’s the consensus I reached after polling a group of UFV students: pornography is both good and bad.

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By Xtina (Contributor) – Email

Print Edition: November 20, 2013

Watching porn can spice up a sex life or put pressure to be perfect.

Watching porn can spice up a sex life or put pressure to be perfect.

Is watching porn a good thing or a bad thing? Can it be beneficial or does it only lead to depravity? Here’s the consensus I reached after polling a group of UFV students: pornography is both good and bad. The group was roughly half male, half female, and of various sexual orientations. They agreed that the benefits of watching porn slightly outweigh the drawbacks.

Watching porn as a couple, for instance, can be an exciting and useful tool in spicing up an otherwise declining sex life. Porn also allows you to research what turns you on. Watching it may change your outlook on what you once thought was taboo, easing fears that you are the only one who gets turned on by…whatever.

But is it possible that pornography is making sex too fantastical? Women in much of the porn made today have big, perfect breasts and completely hairless, tight bodies. They are directed to smile and be enthusiastic when at times I’m sure the last thing they want to do is climb aboard a strange penis or get a messy facial. So what does it say about women who perpetuate this depravity of females by not only watching but embracing this style of love-making? Have women submitted to behaving only in ways which turn men on and fulfill their fantasies?

Of the handful of women I’ve talked to about this issue, two thirds said they watched porn a few times but weren’t into it. They found the storylines, or lack thereof, cheesy and phallocentric. The other third proclaimed their love for watching porn and said they felt empowered by watching porn with their partner and behaving like a porn star in the bedroom.

So I guess the mantra “to each his (or her) own” is appropriate in this discussion, but what about the dangers associated with watching pornography? The surreal nature of pornography can lead to dangerous behaviour and unrealistic expectations. Additionally, watching too much porn can change an intimate and loving act into exhibitionism. There is also the consideration of whether or not watching too much porn makes it more difficult to get aroused by “vanilla” sexsexual acts that don’t involve “colouring outside the lines,” so to speak.

Dangers aside, porn is alive and well in our oversexed culture. It flashes on our screens while downloading media and sneaks into our Friday night movie lineup, sandwiched between Viagra commercials and diet infomercials. We can’t escape it. We either have to take it in stride and ignore the flashing images of nude or scantily clad women in sexually suggestive poses that litter our media, or embrace it and hop on the party bus; throw out our granny panties and take a pole-dancing class.

Whatever you decide, make sure it’s your decision and you’re not falling victim to the power of suggestion and pressure from the media. Sex can be a fun and dispassionate activity, but it also holds power and can be extremely special and life altering. Don’t be afraid to try new things, but don’t let its ever-present nature desensitize youd.

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