By Pankaj Sharma (Contributor) – Email
[pt id=’29266′ size=’large’]
There are rites of passage common to many of us, things that we look back and reflect on, good or bad: our first bike ride, scraped knee, chipotle dip, crush, and — probably the freshest memory for some of us — our first failed university class. I wish it were a rare experience, but it happens. Sometimes it’s a course outside your program (math is hard if you’re out of practice), but too often it’s just a matter of you holding the ball up in the beginning of the semester, getting sidetracked by something more interesting, dropping the ball, and then feeling so upset about the whole thing you don’t bother trying to pick it back up.
Whatever the reason though — and there are many valid ones, since life happens outside the classroom, and some things will take priority over Victorian literature or early Western political thought — what matters most is how you deal with the fact that this happened. Take a minute. Breathe. It’s not the end of the world; not many things that come printed on a report card will be. (Possible exception being highly classified KGB op teams.) Yes, if you need this class you’re going to have to retake it, and yes, you spent $500 on a glorified audit, but there is always a bright side. It can be a learning opportunity, a chance to actually grow as a human being. Just be mindful of the distinction between learning from an experience and dwelling on one. Shore up your weaknesses, don’t pick at them. Take part in study groups, try re-typing your notes next time, use a different coloured highlighter — just don’t wallow.
Life is a lot like a game of beach volleyball (follow me here) and sometimes you let the ball drop and the game stops. You feel bad, but you pick up the ball and try again. If you load yourself down with regret and shame it’s a lot like playing with a ball covered in sand. When you get back into the game, you’re inevitably going to get a bunch of dirt in your eyes and then make more mistakes because you’re weepy and irritated.
So, my advice: dunk the ball in the water and start off the next play clean. The equivalent here of going the extra mile of drying the ball in a towel would be doing something to get your confidence back. It doesn’t even have to be related to your studies, just something to which you can apply the lessons you learned and be proud of the end result.
Try baking bread. It’s one of humankind’s greatest achievements, but it’s 2016 and I believe in you. It takes patience and motivation to persevere and chase perfection. Your first loaf is probably going to be too dense; you either didn’t knead enough or forgot an ingredient. (Bless your heart if you attempted to make your own starting yeast or sourdough.) However, once you master the skills of volleyball/baking/studying, you are left with something tangible, a success that can literally give life. What I’m trying to get across here is that I really wish I had spent more time planning out this rambling mess, but at least I did it.
