Midterm season is here, and the sad truth is that not everyone is going to end up with the grade they were hoping for. For some people, that’s hard to take. It’s easy to think of yourself as a failure or not good enough when those “definitely at least a B” tests come back far lower. But letting yourself fall into the trap of negativity can be a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Once hidden and scorned, mental health is a constant topic in this day and age. Mental illness can affect us in a variety of different ways, and can be influenced by biological makeup, negative experiences, and today’s topic: cognitive thoughts. Cognitive thought is the process of thoughts and emotions that stem from stimuli we encounter in our day-to-day lives. As we go through life and examine the environment around us and the way society works, we put labels on ourselves. Not labels like white, black, gay, straight, etc.; those societal labels are vastly different from the ones I’m talking about today. These labels are the awful things we feel and say about ourselves in spite of who we really are. Dealing with such negative emotions is never easy, but there is a way.
Life can be hard, and negative stimuli and memories can haunt us for a long time. Sometimes these events can be so harmful to our emotions that they cloud our better judgment and lead us to demean ourselves. This unhealthy way of thinking can cause problems in our day-to-day lives. I’ve had personal experience with labeling myself, and nothing good has come out of it. To always think negatively about yourself, to bully your own emotions, is detrimental to your mental health. There are already countless difficult things in life, and adding stress and sadness that doesn’t need to be there is a hard way to live.
A dear friend of mine once told me that her grandmother taught her a valuable lesson. She’d said, “If you keep thinking badly about yourself, it shall come to pass.” I was intrigued by this idea, and my friend went on, explaining her grandmother “told us this whenever we felt down, and it always stuck with me. What Grandmother had meant was that if you kept believing that you are a disappointment, a bad friend, a bad spouse, etc., the thoughts in your head will become reality.”
Thoughts turn into our actions, and by thinking we are a bad person we can easily convince ourselves to act on it. However, we can change our ways of thinking and the lens we put over our eyes. Changing the way we see ourselves is no easy task, but the sooner we try, the sooner emotions can be improved. No one should believe that they are not good enough or a disappointment, whatever their grades may be, and regardless of other circumstances dragging them down. While it’s worth considering a free, confidential appointment with one of UFV’s counsellors, reinforcing positive thoughts is a first step to healing self-labeling and improving our mental state. Whenever negative thoughts about ourselves begin to surface, combat them with positive reinforcement. There are always encouraging things going on, even if they’re hard to see at first. List off all the positive things about yourself and consider the cause of your negative thinking and the lies that have been placed inside of your head. There is always a positive part of your person. Stick to that thought and do not let the awful things people have told you, or that you have assumed about yourself, dictate how you live your life.
