Developing a crush can be intimidating; it can even make you feel like you’re getting sick. For me, as soon as I start to feel the symptoms, I fervently deny them until I’m afflicted with a headache — or heartache. Sometimes this “sickness” is fleeting; at other times, it lingers. If you’ve experienced having a crush and deal with long-lasting symptoms, I might have to diagnose you with lovesickness.
I truly feel that having a crush can be so much fun, but it has its downsides too. Despite the possibility of not being able to pair with the person you have a crush on — leading to lovesickness — I believe there’s still a way to enjoy the experience of having a crush from beginning to end instead of suffering through it.
When you develop a crush that gets your head spinning and gives you feverish chills, it’s hard not to fantasize: What will that first kiss be like? How will your first date go? Having a crush can be confusing; it may bring emotions that you don’t experience in any other circumstance — for me, that ranges from overwhelmingly giddy to horrifically melancholic.
It can be difficult to suppress the desire of being wanted by someone, but it’s important to acknowledge how you feel and find a healthy way to deal with your emotions. Instead of letting your feelings stagnate, try directing your energies elsewhere — or you could attempt acting on them. If you’re crushing on someone, and really want to see how it goes, I encourage you to ask them out!
I once had a crush on someone in one of my classes, but felt afraid of being rejected harshly. At the end of the semester, despite feeling nervous, I challenged my fear and decided to ask this person out. In the end, I got turned down, but in the nicest way possible. Regardless of the rejection, I felt a lot better after the experience, because it wasn’t as bad as I was afraid it would be.
I realize now that this was something I needed to go through. I was scared out of my mind, but I did it for myself. I learned from that moment, and now I know what it’s like to ask someone out. This also helped me learn how to get over a crush; how to move on. I’m not saying that each time you have a crush it’ll go how you want, but there’s nothing wrong with trying and putting yourself out there.
Romantic feelings are complex and everyone has their own ways of dealing with them. If you ever feel embarrassed about having a crush just know you’re not alone.
The cycle of crushing, yearning, pining, and desiring might be a nausea-inducing ordeal, but no matter if you’ve found the love of your life or are still waiting, know that your worth does not lie in anyone else’s desire for you. Having a crush can allow you to learn more about yourself and what you crave from a romantic relationship. I encourage you to let yourself, healthily, indulge in these crushes. But don’t let them crush you; instead take them as opportunities to grow.
