By Paige Hoblak (Contributor) – Email
Print Edition: March 21, 2012
It’s in the campus air like rain clouds in the sky; its presence cannot go unseen. It is the most daunting time of year and it never fails to have me question why I do this to myself. The library and computer labs become ridiculously packed with overtired, anxiety-ridden students. It’s the last month of school and everything that you managed to get away with leaving unfinished or unread up until now is suddenly catching up to you.
I’m confident every student is familiar with the panic associated with the last month of classes before summer. The stress that goes along with final exams and papers is sometimes unbearable. There is always a moment during this time where I feel like I am going to collapse, but something seems to keep me going. My mind is experiencing overload, and not only does this have a personal impact, but it also influences my behaviour and relationships. Let’s just say it might be better to just stay away from me…
The doubts during this time lead me to contemplate the incentive for success. What is a BA really even good for? Why do I need a degree when it won’t necessarily land me a job? Is four years of stress really worth it in the end? These questions spin through my mind. When I am up at 5 a.m. trying to cram-study for my finals, the benefit seems to be extremely unworth it.
On the other hand, I believe that students have a sense of determination unlike any other. Students have the imagination, tenacity, and tools to change the world for the better. We work hard day and night just to get a few steps closer to our ultimate objective: achieving our dreams and feeding our minds with knowledge. It is scary to think that we will only ever know a fraction of our field considering several years of hard research and study. This, however, is reassuring to me considering it would be a very mundane world if we could easily access all knowledge.
During the last month of the semester every year I always hear a voice inside my head, navigating me through the hell. This little voice is the same one that enables me to dream big despite what reality may have me believe. This voice is the sound of everyone who has ever told me that I cannot work a job that both pays and I am passionate about. This is the voice of society’s doubt, trying to persuade me to ignore my potential. This voice is what pushes me every year when I’d rather do anything but study, read or research. I feel as if this voice will be the key to my success, helping to constantly remind me how badly I want to achieve my dreams and career aspirations.
That said, I have been given no promises regarding what my degree will do for me. Finding a job in my field might prove to be even more difficult than the economy had me believe. My degree may only collect dust on my book shelf, but what I do know is that these years, when I look back on my life, will probably be my best. I have been given the freedom to learn what I want without restriction, fuelling my ongoing quest for knowledge. With the last few weeks of school closing in on us the last thing we can think of is the future benefit this hell will lead us to. Let the thought of everyone who ever told you that you couldn’t do something be the force that carries you through this month. We must to try to remember the cliché of keeping in mind the destination rather than the journey. Our university experience will prove its worth in time; every minute and every penny spent will lead to something much greater, even without the guarantees.
