Let us turn Impark into OurPark

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This article was published on September 12, 2016 and may be out of date. To maintain our historical record, The Cascade does not update or remove outdated articles.
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There are a lot of smart people out there telling me there is a problem with parking at UFV. A bunch of them. Great people. Smart people who know I am the man to go to to solve their problems.

I love solving people’s problems; I’m the best at it, great. What these people are telling me, is Impark is making it hard to park! They have park in their name, this should be easy for them! People are saying Impark isn’t sending their best ticketers, not the nice ones. No, we get the ones who put a ticket on your car after you just came by to drop something off. It was only 10 minutes! We have to keep ticketers out of our lots — students can’t afford to pay for two hours of parking, when all they came to do was buy a textbook!

I say, we take that health and wellness fee, and we build a wall! A great big wall, all around the parking spots. Keep out those damn ticketers, so our students can sell their books! It’ll be fantastic, but no gates. We don’t want those ticketers getting in. Remember folks, if there is ever a ballot for UFV president, you write in my name!

 

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