By Taylor Breckles (Contributor) – Email
Print Edition: October 2, 2013
Is sex really the glue that holds a romantic relationship together? Let’s face it – when someone claims his or her relationship is on a “friends with benefits” basis, it’s usually safe to conclude they’re not baking cookies together. But is that a bad thing?
When you want to vent to somebody, you have your close friends. When you need to laugh, a funny friend is always there. When you want to do something mindless, you can go to a movie with a friend. But would you ever go to your friends for bedroom activities? Doubtful. Hence: friends with benefits.
Not needing to spread yourself out among your friends can be awesome. But if or when that relationship ends, you’re at a loss. That one person is gone, and the hunt begins to find a new emotional crutch.
So maybe being friends with benefits isn’t such a bad thing; you aren’t investing everything into a person who might let you down.
You get a friend who can comfort you without any of the other baggage (unless you want it). You don’t have to worry about that person’s opinion on your social life. You don’t have to stress about gifts or dates. You don’t have to worry about someone’s parents liking you. Basically, you don’t have any of the obligations dictated by our society’s guide to dating.
A lot of negativity has been placed on the term, however, making it hard for people to embrace this more open way of finding personal fulfillment. It is frowned upon to be with a person if the main reason is for sex, even though many romantic relationships are like that anyway. Either that, or else this type of relationship has been glorified and turned into a perfect happily ever after – which transforms this immoral association into the accepted version.
Take the movie Friends with Benefits. It starts out emotion-free; just two friends getting it on together with no strings attached. But how does it end? They fall madly in love and everything ends up peachy-keen. I, for one, have never taken to this kind of friendship, but I still doubt that it turns out so perfectly.
Every type of relationship has its flaws, but which is less flawed in the end? Would it be beneficial to have multiple friendship categories instead of one combined relationship? If you happen to find that Disney love, good for you, stick with it; but for the rest of us?
If you’re tired of committed relationship stress or you happen to have a friend you would like to be more connected to, this may be something to look into.
