By Leanna Pankratz (The Cascade) – Email
Print Edition: January 25, 2012
It all began at a small Abbotsford church called The River, where Lisa Marziali, Amy Schmidt, Danielle Michaud, and Tamara Larson bonded over common interests and their commonality as 29 to 30-year-old women who are all single and virginal. Virginity, as a choice, reflects the four’s Christian beliefs that God calls Christians to remain pure and abstain from sexual intercourse until marriage. The foursome became fast friends, and before long, a plan for a book dealing with single life, virginity, and dating began to take shape. The ideas for the book slowly evolved into a blog, Confessions of a 29-Year-Old Virgin. The blog was meant to provide a community for each other and others like them, as well as a method of processing and sharing the laughter, tears, joy, and sometimes loneliness faced by any single woman through weekly entries.
One month into the blog’s existence, the women were surprised by a phone call from television network TLC, who was interested in the four being involved in the pilot of a new series to be called Virgin Diaries. After careful consideration, and in the four’s own words, a “whole lot of prayer,” they said yes, and so began a flurry of media attention that has provided a platform for these women to share their stories.
The Cascade had the opportunity to speak with Lisa Marziali—a 30-year-old photographer, and one of the four young women behind the blog—about the proverbial whirlwind that has been the past few months. “It’s been so exciting, a blessing, and truly challenging in some ways,” she stated. “But above all, it’s been a fantastic medium to get our story out there, and to communicate the stand we are taking through our choice to live a life of sexual purity. It’s a polarizing subject, and there are many people with strong opinions, but we love inspiring discussion and conversation.”
In a culture that thrives on sexuality as a commodity, the concept of virginity as a conscious decision is one that is not often discussed in an all-inclusive and well-rounded manner. “We want to break the stereotypes,” said Marziali firmly, referring to the often caricatured version of the abstinent male or female. “We’re normal, fun-loving girls, who live genuinely full and thriving existences without sex. It’s possible!” she laughed. “Sex is a wonderful thing in its intended context – marriage between two loving people. Until then, it doesn’t have to play a role.”
The success of the blog has opened up many doors for conversation and discussion among readers and creators. When asked about any specific encounters with readers, Marziali gets excited. “We’ve gotten so many emails from women all over the world. A lot of these messages are from women thanking us for showing them that they’re not alone in their pursuit. There have been many guys, too, that message us to say thank you, and to encourage us that there are men out there that agree with this pursuit of purity.”
“One message that stands out in my mind, however, is a message we got from a girl in England who said that our blog was what got her through 2011. If our story can reach even that one girl, then that makes it all worth it. That is why we are here.”
Marziali stressed that their purpose is not to push their lifestyle on anyone. “Our aim is to be non-judgmental. We are not trying to “reach” anyone. Not everyone is going to choose virginity, but anyone can learn from someone who shares their story. And that’s what we are doing – sharing our stories.”
When asked about specific challenges in the sudden wave of media attention, Marziali paused. “Most negative attention comes from individuals who don’t know who we are. It comes from assumptions about us and our lifestyle that are completely untrue. We don’t read negative feedback, because we know why we are here. We are confident. I know who I am, and what my calling is,” she continued. “I’m on top of the world right now.”
