By Kate Nickelchok (Contributor) – Email
Print Edition: March 6, 2013
Questions:
(A) How big is a big penis?
(B) Who is more prone to STIs, girls or guys?
(C) How much lube should I use?
These are only a couple of the roughly 200 anonymous sex questions asked over three years of Baker House’s Sex Ed Night. (Answers found at the bottom of the article).
Last Monday, UFV’s Residence Services hosted its third annual Sex Education Night: a peer-to-peer conversation that goes under the covers to talk openly about bodies, intimacy, relationships and, of course, sex.
The event was started by myself and work-study students from UFV Pride and the Human Rights and Harassment Office in 2010 as an interdepartmental solution to the lack of sexual health and LGBT services at UFV. Since then, the event has evolved, attracting more students, different questions and new hosts each year.
This year’s Sex Ed Night was scheduled close to Valentine’s Day, as Baker House’s follow up to the romantic fervour of February. Even on a midterm-season school night, the event drew about 20 students. That is a typically good turnout for Sex Ed Night, although the event has attracted up to 60 attendees in the past, most of whom saunter in with shy curiosity but leave with big smiles, new information and free condoms.
“We had an amazing turnout,” says resident assistant (RA) and event co-organizer Chelsea Dueck, “And as always, we as the hosts learnt a great deal! I’ve gone to the [Sex Ed Night] for three years and have always had a great time.”
Like Dueck, co-host Sarah Mazzantti also became involved as organizer after positive past experiences, “I attended Sex Ed Night in the past and found the information very helpful! Personally, hearing some of the information out loud really hammered home some topics I was unfamiliar about.”
The design of Sex Ed Night is to give residents a chance to ask their burning questions anonymously. The answers are then thoroughly researched and presented on by peers in a relaxed and friendly environment. “Sex is a topic that isn’t always openly discussed,” explains Mazzantti. “I wanted to create a safe environment where people could listen and talk about sex and relationships. I wanted people to have a good experience talking about a wonderful thing.”
The underlying goal is developing a respect for and confidence in one’s own body. Letting student concerns lead the conversation steered it away from the fear tactics that often dominates teenage sex education.
Questions have ranged form the extremely personal—like asking advice on how to wait for sex, how to practice for your first kiss or what to expect when losing your virginity—to the slightly more sexperimental world of BDSM and the various (and not always suggested) uses of honey.
Despite its enthusiastic reviews, every year the Sex Ed Night raises institutional eyebrows as to how to address such a touchy subject. This year, for example, the event’s anonymous question box was moved from the residence’s high traffic front desk lobby to a half-hidden mail enclave out of worries it would cause offence.
There is currently no university service where students can seek advice on sexual health outside Sex Ed Night. Additionally, until a recent SUS initiative, we were probably the only secular university in Canada that didn’t have condoms freely available on campus. The repeated successes of Sex Ed Night should prompt UFV to adopt some of the event’s mentality: making resources and information available to students is empowering, both to the community and the individual.
As Baker House alumnus, and repeated Sex Ed Night participant, I’ve been consistently energized and enlightened by the event. Come for the laughter and free candy and leave with knowledge made for better and safer sex!
Answers:
(A) A “big” penis is about this big (picture different individuals holding their hands varying lengths apart depending on personal preference). The average size in Canada is considered between four to six inches, but leading studies show: it’s more about the motion of the ocean than the size of the ship.
(B) Girls. An unfortunate by-product of having internal genitalia.
(C) Depends on preference and situation but a good bet is about a nickel-sized dollop you should then rub and warm between your hands before use. But as the saying goes, the wetter the better.
