By Amy Van Veen (The Cascade) – Email
Print Edition: July 3, 2013
It’s that time of year, ladies. The time of year when, no matter your body type, you get to feel like a walrus in changing rooms from the curse of ill-fitting bathing suits.
I say this because I just went through it, and I’d like to share some of my wisdom for making the shopping experience a little better – specifically when looking for the new modest trend of one-pieces.
Don’t scoff at the mention of a one-suit. Certainly its target demographic is mostly all of our mothers and grandmothers. And sure, the last time most of us wore a one-piece was when the seven-year-old version of ourselves wore those athletic Speedo versions. But fear not! One-piece suits can be absolutely adorable. Just one look on ModCloth.com proves that.
But, as with most clothing items, purchasing online is just not an ideal situation. And that’s where my tips come in handy.
First of all, beware of the nursing pad look. This happens when paranoia of pointy nipples lead bathing suit manufacturers to throw in really awkwardly shaped padding. It’s fairly awful. It looks like you’re in the middle of breastfeeding and there’s imminent danger of leaking mammary glands.
Secondly, don’t be deterred by “endurance” swimwear. It need not be the suit of your youth. Even though it’s designed for sportier situations than sitting on the beach and reading the latest chick-lit, it’s kind of a blessing in disguise – literally. There’s a whole whackload of extra support in the tummy, around the boobs and all around that glorious butt region. Endurance means it has to survive the most grueling sporty situations which means it is designed to keep things in place. This is a wonderful, beautiful thing and there are cuter versions of the Olympian staple.
Thirdly, please do yourself a favour and turn away from the mirror when you’re pulling up what is essentially waterproof Spanx. No one’s thighs look good when being stuffed through elastic casing. And no one’s tummy is beautiful when you’re straining to shimmy yourself into that necessity of summer. Plus, when you turn away from the mirror, you can blindly sort yourself out and then turn around in a slow reveal much like they do in Extreme Makeover – and, as a bonus, you don’t have to deal with plastic surgery and veneers that look like horse teeth! It’s just you, with a little tummy control, a cute neckline and a classy style that is nothing like your grandma’s.
But where do you find such creations? Cute teen stores are filled with slinky bikinis, but where, oh where, are the gorgeous one-pieces? Well, Old Navy has a number of styles – some fun and printed and others dark colours and ruched; the latter are perfect for if you have a few bumps you don’t want on display. Winners also has a few options – though in my experience they didn’t really favour women with long torsos. And if you want to spend a little more, you can hit up The Bay. Bonnie Brooks may have the voice of a robot, but she has done wonders in bringing in non-old-lady styles, so look beyond the granny prints and pick out the classic blacks with polka-dots, lace trim and grown-up ruffles.
Or, if you’re really daring, go onto ModCloth and buy one of those amazingly beautiful creations – just make sure you read the reviews!
