“Are you okay?” my co-worker asked me as she glared at my belly, convinced something was wrong. To avoid any awkward confrontation, I laughed and brushed it away as if it were a joke. But there was nothing funny about that conversation.
The truth is, her constant staring and repeated questioning of whether I was okay or not — simply because I looked bloated — shattered my confidence into pieces. That evening, I couldn’t face myself in the mirror without hating every inch of my body. Days like those are when self-loathing takes over. All I wanted was to starve myself until I lost all my weight, wishing I could wake up the next day magically skinnier and more beautiful.
It wasn’t the first time something like this had happened, but conversations like these make me feel as though people are shoving my thyroid condition in my face. My condition, called underactive thyroid, prevents my thyroid gland from making the right amount of hormones, something people don’t consider when they make comments about others’ appearance.
The thyroid gland is located at the front of the neck and under the skin. Though small, it plays a significant role in the body. It produces hormones that regulate one’s metabolism, a combination of processes that also affect how the body converts the food we consume into energy.
When this gland isn’t properly functioning, it can affect your entire body; including your cardio-vascular system, nervous system, digestive system, and reproductive system. There are four main conditions that can affect your thyroid: hypothyroidism, hyperthyroidism, goitre and thyroid cancer.
I got diagnosed with hypothyroidism — a condition where the thyroid gland does not produce sufficient thyroid hormones and slows down the metabolism — in the summer of 2024. For me, in practice, it felt like constant exertion and as though I might faint when I rest, fragile nails, and unintentional weight gain.
Beyond these external symptoms, what affects me the most is how much it makes my body unrecognizable. Hypothyroidism decides how my body will look on any given day. On some days, I feel moderately okay, while on others I visibly look either skinnier or crazily bloated. It’s a constant battle that my body doesn’t always look the way I want it to be.
I am currently on medication to regulate my hormones, but I admit it was hard for me to start taking it seriously. I used to convince myself that if I ignored it, it might actually disappear, but it never did. Instead, it got worse — I started gaining unhealthy weight. It took a hot minute for it to fully sink in: this is something I will likely have to deal with for the rest of my life.
Hyperthyroidism on the other hand is a condition where the thyroid gland produces hormones in excess. This can lead to symptoms including sensitivity to heat, irregular menstrual cycles, and difficulties falling asleep.
Conditions like goitres are when the thyroid gland grows unusually large in size and develops small lumps under the skin. It can lead to conditions including obesity and metabolic resistance.
Around 200 million people around the world suffer from thyroid disease. Despite the staggeringly high statistics, thyroid disease is often misunderstood or overlooked. Many symptoms including fatigue and weight fluctuations can resemble everyday lifestyle influences. Hence why it is easier to brush these symptoms off as poor diet or lack of physical activity.
For students and young adults, the thin line can be deceiving. Being a university student myself, when I faced these symptoms, I blamed it on my busy schedule rather than investigating the underlying medical condition.
That’s why awareness matters.
Understanding how the thyroid gland works can help people recognize when something in their body feels off. There is still good news — thyroid disease can be regulated through medications and other treatments including surgery and radiation. However, early awareness can help in taking the necessary steps and receiving care in time.
For me, learning to live with hypothyroidism has been a learning curve. It has meant looking at myself through a kinder lens, paying attention to changes in my body, and especially listening to what my body needs.
Honestly, it is very hard to love myself on days when my body doesn’t look the way I want it to, but I try to remind myself that my body is trying its best to keep me healthy, and that it is already beautiful no matter the shape.
If I could offer you one piece of advice, it would be: take care of your body and be kind toward it.
