OpinionDear Tim Horton’s

Dear Tim Horton’s

This article was published on September 25, 2012 and may be out of date. To maintain our historical record, The Cascade does not update or remove outdated articles.
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By Dessa Bayrock (The Cascade) – Email

Print Edition: September 19, 2012

I think you know what I’m about to say; we both saw this coming. Let’s face it – the magic just isn’t there anymore. I think we should see other people. We had some good times—even great ones—but it’s time to call it quits.

I’ll always remember the way we started flirting in my second year of university. I saw you lingering in the entrance of the library building; people flocked to you, and you had a way of coaxing people out of their shells as they whiled away the time before class. You had an absolute charm about you, but I could see you were a small-town kid at heart. It was a dichotomy that I loved.

It was the beginning of an amazing time, Tim – you warmed my hands, time and time again, after ice-skating and snow days alike. When campus paths became treacherous and icy in the winter, I still stubbornly made the trek to your door. On the way back to class, with you beside me, I knew you were more than just a coffee – you were my best friend.

You were the support that kept me going through countless all-nighter study sessions, and I can’t even begin to count the number of assignments that would never have been completed without your help.

But I’m reaching the end of my degree now, and I think I need my sleep. You’re always fresh, and you’re always energetic and ready for more, but I can’t keep up with you any longer. I just know there’s a first-year student who needs you more than I do, and you’ll be happier with her.

Tim, I just can’t do it anymore. I know that I’m breaking your heart as I say this, but I’ve found myself longing for other coffee. We still spend time together, but I find myself getting bored by you, and before I know what’s happening you’re cold and distant. It’s just a waste of both our time.

Let’s face it: our relationship has been flagging ever since roll up the rim to win. I can’t count the number of hot beverages you talked me into buying, just for that thrill when I thought I might have won. You knew my weakness was that Panasonic camera – you were with me the first time I saw it in stores, and you knew that I wanted it more than any other point-and-shoot. Tim, if you weren’t going to let me win it, then why on earth would you pick it as a top prize?

I could even forgive you for that, but it took me over 25 beverages before I won a measly donut. Tim, I don’t even like donuts. It was a slap in the face, and we both knew it.

Finally, this summer you were always hanging around my office. Always fresh; always Tim Horton’s. I just got sick of you, every morning and every afternoon. You know what, Tim? I flirted with a Tassimo beverage station in August, and that opened my eyes to what I’d been putting up with. More often than not, you leave a bad taste in my mouth, and I deserve better than that. There are some things even milk and sugar can’t fix.

We have a lot of mutual friends, and I think we can move on from this without making a big scene about it. I believe that true love is out there for both of us, Tim – just not with each other. At the end of the day, I need to think about what I want out of life. I can’t ignore how I keep asking myself how I can be with a coffee shop that doesn’t serve Americanos.

There will always be a place in my heart for you, Tim, but there is no longer a place in my travel mug.

I just need a stronger coffee than you can be, and I need more variation in my meals than just bagels.

Yours fondly,

Dessa Bayrock

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