Life is tough and confusing and weird. We all need help sometimes, and when you need an expert opinion, you turn to an expert opinion-giver like Robin Halper. Whatever problem you’re facing in life, Robin will have a solution. ***The Cascade cannot guarantee the effectiveness of Robin’s unique approach to life, but if you’re in a jam, get some advice by writing to halp@ufvcascade.ca
The new world
Dear Robin,
I’m starting to venture out into the real world, but I’m having trouble with my face accessories. I wear glasses all of the time, but I’m finding it difficult to keep them defogged when I wear a mask over my nose and mouth. It would be helpful if I could see when I’m at the grocery store, but I also want to stay somewhat safe and smart by wearing my face mask. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Foggy-Faced
Hello,
For everyone who didn’t learn about fog in glasses and other helpful knowledge in elementary school, glasses fog up when wearing a mask because the moist air from your nose and mouth travel through the open spaces between your skin and the mask that’s under your eyes, therefore making your glasses fog up. That’s as scientific as I can get. So to fix this problem you’ve got to seal the mask to the top part of your face. Make sense? I suggest using some water-resistant Spider-Man bandages to eliminate those air pockets. Your mask might even be too loose, so tighten that baby up! If your glasses are still foggy, I suggest heading to your optometrist to look into your options for laser eye surgery.Â
Robin
A different type of party
Dear Robin,
How the hell do I get out of a baby shower over Zoom?!
Sincerely,
Stuck
Hello,
Baby showers are already incredibly terrible with tacky decorations that let everyone know if the baby is going to be born with a penis or vagina, the ridiculous games where everyone has to match the celebrity to their baby pic, and the endless time period where the mother-to-be passes around every. single. gift. But putting that all on Zoom makes it a party the devil probably created himself. Since you probably care about this mother-to-be, don’t tell her how awful the Zoom shower is going to be, just let her know you won’t attend (you don’t need to tell her why) but would love to celebrate with her once it’s safe to. Everyone wins. Including the unborn baby who won’t have your opinion of them stained by this Zoom shower.
Robin
