OpinionSnapshot: Top 40 gluttony

Snapshot: Top 40 gluttony

This article was published on January 22, 2017 and may be out of date. To maintain our historical record, The Cascade does not update or remove outdated articles.
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The Romans used to dump scorching oil on invading marauders from their towering walls above. I imagine it deterred the barbarians; it would certainly keep me off their lawn. I’m reminded of this ancient weapon of war because I’ve been subjected to a similarly flesh-melting torture from the heights of the Student Union Building.

I’m not big on such high energy music. It’s like being IV’d ephedrine all day long, and not in a good way. I can’t take it anymore; my nerves are fried, I look like a meth addict, I haven’t slept in days.

Wasn’t the reason that they refused to play CIVL because the SUB was considered to be a study space? Try studying to a barrage of boiling oil and fiery arrows straight at your eardrums. At least they’ve turned the volume down from last Thursday. Someone must have realized this isn’t a bloody disco.

Hyperbolic analogy aside, this top 40 stuff is more like sugary glazed cake. I don’t mind a slice now and then but good grief, could anyone live off of that crap? Give me some sustenance, give me some jazz.

I find it oppressive and unsettling. And I get it Shawn, a girl like me deserves a gentleman.

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